News
Another great coach I know, Joshua Davies, is holding a persuasive presentation course July 17th in Seoul.
I personally know that he is an excellent trainer and presenter.
If you are looking at increasing your presentation skills, I highly recommend you attend.
The see the brochure and register, please click the link below:
http://power.laminstitute.net/
Quote
"Make a gift of your life and lift all mankind by being kind, considerate, forgiving, and compassionate at all times, in all places, and under all conditions, with everyone as well as yourself. This is the greatest gift anyone can give."
-David Hawkins
My Thoughts
Instead of sharing my thoughts this week, I encourage you to reflect upon this quote and look at ways to put it into practice.
Have an incredible week.
Showing posts with label forgiveness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label forgiveness. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Why Do We Shout When Angry?
News
I will be conducting a two-hour workshop around the end of this month. More details will follow soon.
Instead of sharing a quote and my thoughts this week, I wanted to share a story I found with you:
Story
A Hindu saint who was visiting river Ganges to take bath found a group of family members on the banks, shouting in anger at each other. He turned to his disciples smiled and asked.
'Why do people shout in anger shout at each other?'
Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm, we shout.'
'But, why should you shout when the other person is just next to you? You can as well tell him what you have to say in a soft manner.' asked the saint
Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the other disciples.
Finally the saint explained, .
'When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other to cover that great distance.
What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other but talk softly, Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is either nonexistent or very small...'
The saint continued, 'When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.'
He looked at his disciples and said.
'So when you argue do not let your hearts get distant, Do not say words that distance each other more, Or else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return.'
Have an outstanding week.
Bob
I will be conducting a two-hour workshop around the end of this month. More details will follow soon.
Instead of sharing a quote and my thoughts this week, I wanted to share a story I found with you:
Story
A Hindu saint who was visiting river Ganges to take bath found a group of family members on the banks, shouting in anger at each other. He turned to his disciples smiled and asked.
'Why do people shout in anger shout at each other?'
Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm, we shout.'
'But, why should you shout when the other person is just next to you? You can as well tell him what you have to say in a soft manner.' asked the saint
Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the other disciples.
Finally the saint explained, .
'When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other to cover that great distance.
What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other but talk softly, Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is either nonexistent or very small...'
The saint continued, 'When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.'
He looked at his disciples and said.
'So when you argue do not let your hearts get distant, Do not say words that distance each other more, Or else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return.'
Have an outstanding week.
Bob
Monday, August 8, 2011
Loving All
News
We have decided to discount all of our at-home coaching programs. These programs are great if you don't have time to make it to a structured coaching session. If you purchase a program by Sunday, August 21st you will receive a 60% discount.
Please check out www.oneamazinglife.com for more information on these programs. If you have any questions please email me: bob@oneamazinglife.com
Quote
“Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls. A joyful heart is the inevitable result of a heart burning with love”
-Mother Teresa
My Thoughts
Do you love yourself? I don't mean in some narcissistic sense. Do you respect yourself? Have you forgiven yourself for wrongs you may have committed in the past? You must love yourself before you can begin to truly love others.
Speaking of truly loving others, do you think you could love all people, regardless of their perceived imperfections? Do you think you could love someone without expecting anything in return? For many people loving unconditionally is near impossible. People say they do but their actions don't match their words.
All people are doing what they perceive is the best course of action to take at any given time. So we could say people are ignorant of what is the best course of action because of their perception. Therefore they should be forgiven (or literally you are forgiving yourself for judging them as wrong in the first place). If you start to forgive others, then you can start to let go of judgments. If you can grasp this concept then you can begin to love all of humanity unconditionally. The more people that are able to love unconditionally the better off humanity will become.
All people seek happiness, but only a few truly understand that happiness is internal and does not need to be sought but merely realized. This is hard for people to understand because so many of us were conditioned to believe that if we get something (higher degree, nice car, house, etc...) then we will be happy. But that happiness is an illusion. It fades away after time....usually after a short time.
I suppose their are multiple ways of realizing that happiness is internal. My way was to stretch way outside my comfort zone and follow my dream. So you could say my realization occurred after much struggle. I realized that you could literally have no money, no car, a tiny apartment, etc... and still be perfectly happy. Once you have this realization it stays with you forever. So no matter what situation you are in, no matter what the external stresses are, you can still remain happy.
My suggestion for this week: Forgive someone, and make an honest attempt at loving someone unconditionally.
Have a glorious week.
We have decided to discount all of our at-home coaching programs. These programs are great if you don't have time to make it to a structured coaching session. If you purchase a program by Sunday, August 21st you will receive a 60% discount.
Please check out www.oneamazinglife.com for more information on these programs. If you have any questions please email me: bob@oneamazinglife.com
Quote
“Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls. A joyful heart is the inevitable result of a heart burning with love”
-Mother Teresa
My Thoughts
Do you love yourself? I don't mean in some narcissistic sense. Do you respect yourself? Have you forgiven yourself for wrongs you may have committed in the past? You must love yourself before you can begin to truly love others.
Speaking of truly loving others, do you think you could love all people, regardless of their perceived imperfections? Do you think you could love someone without expecting anything in return? For many people loving unconditionally is near impossible. People say they do but their actions don't match their words.
All people are doing what they perceive is the best course of action to take at any given time. So we could say people are ignorant of what is the best course of action because of their perception. Therefore they should be forgiven (or literally you are forgiving yourself for judging them as wrong in the first place). If you start to forgive others, then you can start to let go of judgments. If you can grasp this concept then you can begin to love all of humanity unconditionally. The more people that are able to love unconditionally the better off humanity will become.
All people seek happiness, but only a few truly understand that happiness is internal and does not need to be sought but merely realized. This is hard for people to understand because so many of us were conditioned to believe that if we get something (higher degree, nice car, house, etc...) then we will be happy. But that happiness is an illusion. It fades away after time....usually after a short time.
I suppose their are multiple ways of realizing that happiness is internal. My way was to stretch way outside my comfort zone and follow my dream. So you could say my realization occurred after much struggle. I realized that you could literally have no money, no car, a tiny apartment, etc... and still be perfectly happy. Once you have this realization it stays with you forever. So no matter what situation you are in, no matter what the external stresses are, you can still remain happy.
My suggestion for this week: Forgive someone, and make an honest attempt at loving someone unconditionally.
Have a glorious week.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Where Do You Stand?
News
No new updates for this week.
Quote
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy. "
-Martin Luther King, Jr.
Thoughts
It is quite easy to be happy with life when things are going our way. It is easy to stand by our convictions when most people agree with us. But what about the times when nothing seems to be working? What about when most are against you? This is where the challenge lies.
Where do you stand?
1. Do you find yourself generally able to maintain an emotional balance regardless of outside circumstances? If so, then you are off to a great start to achieving your dreams.
or
2. Do you find yourself one day complaining about your boss, coworkers, etc..? Then a few days later you are a happy? Then a few days after that you are back to complaining again?
If so, I will tell you that this will get you nowhere. Riding that emotional roller coaster will not lead you to much progress.
Interestingly enough most people are really not aware that they fall into category two. Why? Because they are not aware of the thoughts that are running through their heads. If you are unsure if you fit into this category, I suggest you :
I. Look back over you facebook status updates, twitter updates, text messages, etc...
II. If you keep a diary, go back through and see how often you fluctuate.
III. Make a conscious effort to become more aware of your thoughts and feelings
Remember, Thoughts cause Feelings cause Actions cause Results.
If you find yourself in category 2, what can you do?
I. Ask yourself, "Do I desire to change?". By the way the answer isn't always yes because some people have become so identified with their fluctuating feelings that it becomes part of their "story".
II. If you desire to change, the next step is to really become aware of your thoughts. You can do this through conscious effort, meditation, keeping a diary, hiring a competent certified coach, etc..
III. Start gaining emotional control. How?
-It starts with your thoughts.
Ex: Suppose you are angry at someone for one reason or another (which generally is caused by a misperception of events).
Do not suppress the feeling. Allow the feeling to go through you but stop adding fuel to the fire. Basically break the thought cycle that automatically starts when you are angry.
Then begin trying to shift your perception: Am I willing to explore other ways to look at this? Is there possibly another way to look at the situation? What can I learn from this situation? etc..
You will then begin the process of gaining emotional control.
By the way, if you are dealing with anger issues, forgiveness issues, etc...I recommend two things:
1. Start to seriously think of every single person as your mother (or another loved one).
2. Every time you think of the person that causes you pain, wish them well. Remember don't suppress the feeling. Ex: I hate xxxx. I wish xxxx would get run over by a truck......but if that doesn't happen I wish them well. Now the trick here is that you must do it every single time you have these thoughts about the person causing you pain.
Two books I recommend on that subject:
-"The Four Noble Truths" by the Dalai Lama
-"Building Your Field of Dreams" by Mary Morrissey
The above steps are not easy. But I can tell you from personal experience that if you keep doing them then they will eventually turn into a habit. Once it becomes a habit it is much easier to do them.
Have an incredible week.
No new updates for this week.
Quote
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy. "
-Martin Luther King, Jr.
Thoughts
It is quite easy to be happy with life when things are going our way. It is easy to stand by our convictions when most people agree with us. But what about the times when nothing seems to be working? What about when most are against you? This is where the challenge lies.
Where do you stand?
1. Do you find yourself generally able to maintain an emotional balance regardless of outside circumstances? If so, then you are off to a great start to achieving your dreams.
or
2. Do you find yourself one day complaining about your boss, coworkers, etc..? Then a few days later you are a happy? Then a few days after that you are back to complaining again?
If so, I will tell you that this will get you nowhere. Riding that emotional roller coaster will not lead you to much progress.
Interestingly enough most people are really not aware that they fall into category two. Why? Because they are not aware of the thoughts that are running through their heads. If you are unsure if you fit into this category, I suggest you :
I. Look back over you facebook status updates, twitter updates, text messages, etc...
II. If you keep a diary, go back through and see how often you fluctuate.
III. Make a conscious effort to become more aware of your thoughts and feelings
Remember, Thoughts cause Feelings cause Actions cause Results.
If you find yourself in category 2, what can you do?
I. Ask yourself, "Do I desire to change?". By the way the answer isn't always yes because some people have become so identified with their fluctuating feelings that it becomes part of their "story".
II. If you desire to change, the next step is to really become aware of your thoughts. You can do this through conscious effort, meditation, keeping a diary, hiring a competent certified coach, etc..
III. Start gaining emotional control. How?
-It starts with your thoughts.
Ex: Suppose you are angry at someone for one reason or another (which generally is caused by a misperception of events).
Do not suppress the feeling. Allow the feeling to go through you but stop adding fuel to the fire. Basically break the thought cycle that automatically starts when you are angry.
Then begin trying to shift your perception: Am I willing to explore other ways to look at this? Is there possibly another way to look at the situation? What can I learn from this situation? etc..
You will then begin the process of gaining emotional control.
By the way, if you are dealing with anger issues, forgiveness issues, etc...I recommend two things:
1. Start to seriously think of every single person as your mother (or another loved one).
2. Every time you think of the person that causes you pain, wish them well. Remember don't suppress the feeling. Ex: I hate xxxx. I wish xxxx would get run over by a truck......but if that doesn't happen I wish them well. Now the trick here is that you must do it every single time you have these thoughts about the person causing you pain.
Two books I recommend on that subject:
-"The Four Noble Truths" by the Dalai Lama
-"Building Your Field of Dreams" by Mary Morrissey
The above steps are not easy. But I can tell you from personal experience that if you keep doing them then they will eventually turn into a habit. Once it becomes a habit it is much easier to do them.
Have an incredible week.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Forgive Yourself
Quote
“When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.”
-Catherine Ponder
My Thoughts
Forgiving others can be very difficult at times. However, if you continue to hold on to past memories of hurt you will certainly impede any forward progress. Interestingly enough, when you forgive someone else you will find that you are really forgiving yourself.
This brings up another point. Many people also find it difficult to forgive themselves for past perceived mistakes. For example: Some people will blame themselves for years for a failed marriage/relationship. They run through the "I should of done this or that" scenario. This will plague current relationships and ultimately cause them to end.
What do I recommend if you have trouble forgiving yourself?
Acknowledge that mistakes were made, but do not dwell on those mistakes. You did the best that you could at that time. Admit that perhaps with your current perception you would have done things differently, but remember you can't go back and undo what was done. So move on and continue to live your life to the fullest.
Until next time....
“When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.”
-Catherine Ponder
My Thoughts
Forgiving others can be very difficult at times. However, if you continue to hold on to past memories of hurt you will certainly impede any forward progress. Interestingly enough, when you forgive someone else you will find that you are really forgiving yourself.
This brings up another point. Many people also find it difficult to forgive themselves for past perceived mistakes. For example: Some people will blame themselves for years for a failed marriage/relationship. They run through the "I should of done this or that" scenario. This will plague current relationships and ultimately cause them to end.
What do I recommend if you have trouble forgiving yourself?
Acknowledge that mistakes were made, but do not dwell on those mistakes. You did the best that you could at that time. Admit that perhaps with your current perception you would have done things differently, but remember you can't go back and undo what was done. So move on and continue to live your life to the fullest.
Until next time....
Monday, May 24, 2010
Deep Quotes
There will be no posts for the next two weeks because I will be India.
I am going for some serious meditation, and I am sure I'll write something about my experience when I return.
So, seeing as there won't be any quotes for the next two weeks, I decided to post a few quotes that you could really spend time thinking about.
Quotes:
"One who has control over the mind is tranquil in heat and cold, in pleasure and pain, and in honor and dishonor; and is ever steadfast with the Supreme Self.”
-from the Bhagavad Gita
“Why do you see the splinter in your brother’s eye but do not notice the log in your own eye? … You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly enough to take the splinter out of your brother’s eye.”
-Jesus Christ
"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned."
-Buddha
"O mankind! We created you from a male and a female and made you into nations and tribes that you may know and honor each other (not that you should despise one another). Indeed the most honorable of you in the sight of God is the most righteous."
-from the Qur'an
"People are scared to empty their minds
fearing that they will be engulfed by the void.
What they don’t realize is that
their own mind is the void."
-Huang Po
"Wanting to reform the world without discovering one's true self is like trying to cover the world with leather to avoid the pain of walking on stones and thorns. It is much simpler to wear shoes."
-Ramana Maharshi
Until next time
I am going for some serious meditation, and I am sure I'll write something about my experience when I return.
So, seeing as there won't be any quotes for the next two weeks, I decided to post a few quotes that you could really spend time thinking about.
Quotes:
"One who has control over the mind is tranquil in heat and cold, in pleasure and pain, and in honor and dishonor; and is ever steadfast with the Supreme Self.”
-from the Bhagavad Gita
“Why do you see the splinter in your brother’s eye but do not notice the log in your own eye? … You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly enough to take the splinter out of your brother’s eye.”
-Jesus Christ
"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned."
-Buddha
"O mankind! We created you from a male and a female and made you into nations and tribes that you may know and honor each other (not that you should despise one another). Indeed the most honorable of you in the sight of God is the most righteous."
-from the Qur'an
"People are scared to empty their minds
fearing that they will be engulfed by the void.
What they don’t realize is that
their own mind is the void."
-Huang Po
"Wanting to reform the world without discovering one's true self is like trying to cover the world with leather to avoid the pain of walking on stones and thorns. It is much simpler to wear shoes."
-Ramana Maharshi
Until next time
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Forgiveness
Quote
"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover the prisoner was you."
-Lewis B. Smedes
My Thoughts
Forgiveness is perhaps one of the most difficult habits to develop. However, it is absolutely essential to our personal development. All of us have felt that we have been wronged by someone at sometime. But who gets hurt more by holding on to thoughts of anger, revenge, and hatred? Is it the person(s) or is it us?
In order for us to fully grow we have to let go of these past negative emotions. Remember, many of these negative thoughts and feelings come from our perception of things at the time. Also, it is impossible for us to absolutely know what is going on in someone's mind at the time.
I encourage you to think this week about someone you still hold negative feelings towards. Make an honest attempt to forgive them. Once you release these negative feelings you will feel rejuvenated.
I am not suggesting that this is easy, but over time it can be developed into a habit.
If you are having problems with forgiveness, I recommend reading the following books:
Psycho-Cybernetics by Dr. Maxwell Maltz
Building Your Field of Dreams by Mary Morrissey
Until next time....
"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover the prisoner was you."
-Lewis B. Smedes
My Thoughts
Forgiveness is perhaps one of the most difficult habits to develop. However, it is absolutely essential to our personal development. All of us have felt that we have been wronged by someone at sometime. But who gets hurt more by holding on to thoughts of anger, revenge, and hatred? Is it the person(s) or is it us?
In order for us to fully grow we have to let go of these past negative emotions. Remember, many of these negative thoughts and feelings come from our perception of things at the time. Also, it is impossible for us to absolutely know what is going on in someone's mind at the time.
I encourage you to think this week about someone you still hold negative feelings towards. Make an honest attempt to forgive them. Once you release these negative feelings you will feel rejuvenated.
I am not suggesting that this is easy, but over time it can be developed into a habit.
If you are having problems with forgiveness, I recommend reading the following books:
Psycho-Cybernetics by Dr. Maxwell Maltz
Building Your Field of Dreams by Mary Morrissey
Until next time....
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