Monday, June 25, 2012

Korean War

News
No new updates for this week.

Since June 25th was the 62nd anniversary of the Korean War, I'd like to share a short story so that people will remember. I encourage you to reflect upon this story this week. What lessons can we learn from this?


"SUFFER THE LITTLE CHILDREN TO COME UNTO ME"
Richard W. Cooper was born on December 22, 1929 on the Hawk farm in Pennsylvania. He enlisted in the Army Air Corps December 28, 1946. In October of 1950, he arrived in Korea, where he served with the 5th Air Force. He was wounded in January of 1951, and nursed back to health on a hospital ship in Pusan. He should have gone home, but asked to remain with his outfit. He returned to the United States in April of 1952. During the rest of his service, he was with Strategic Air Command.


On March 1, 1955, he got married in Denver, Colorado. He and his wife settled in Denver, where he started his own business, Mr. "C" Audio/Visual Service Co. He was in business for 30 years, at which time he sold the business, and he and his wife retired to Grand Junction, Colorado in 1996.


Dear Lynnita,
I have considered telling you this every time I visit your website. If I have the courage to do it is in doubt, but I must try. This is the first time I have spoken of this. It hurts - has hurt for fifty years. But if that is God's will, so be it. Here I go....


The following event took place in a field just outside the defense perimeter of our Ammunition Dump, located in the side of a mountain on the Japan Sea coast, about one hundred miles north of Pusan. About 3:00 in the afternoon of a freezing cold December day (27th), I was on guard duty on the west perimeter of our Ammo Dump. I spotted a small Korean walking in the direction of the Dump from about 1/4 mile out in a paddy.


It was not unusual for Korean children to come up to the guards and ask for food or candy. I always carried whatever candy my Mother sent me for the children, because they touched my heart so. But, this time was different in two ways. We had just gotten word a couple days earlier of a small Korean child being used as a human bomb, walking into an outfit north of us, and being blown up through the use of a "rip" cord controlled by North Koreans hidden some yards away. This thought still fresh in my mind, not the fear it could happen to me, but the thought of the horrible act, served to alert me that the North Koreans would stoop much lower than I had imagined.


For some reason, the hair on the back of my neck stood out as I watched this little Korean child walking toward me. I tried to tell myself that I was making something out of nothing-that this was an innocent child coming for candy. But, I also kept thinking that I am not on that guard site to hand out candy, but to protect our precious stockpile of ammo, and my buddies depended on me for that and their own safety.


My mind started screaming wildly-"What to do? What to do?" I did learn to say, "stop, go back", in Korean (it has left me now), and I started shouting that to the child. It was as if the child was deaf and just kept coming. My mind told me that I must consider this little child a danger to our ammo dump and my buddies, and, if I must, shoot to stop this child. But how could I do that? I love children. I can't hurt them.


Then came the time as my shouting was having no effect and the child was getting close. I tried to get the attention of one of my buddies for help, but activity in the dump was making lots of noise. It dawned on me that I was on my own: make a mistake and kill an innocent child and no one would ever understand. I would be labeled a child killer. Or, do nothing and find out the hard way that the child was wired with explosives. I fired two rounds into the field to both sides of the child, still yelling, "stop, go back." I thought about walking out to meet the little child, knowing that I would be asking for trouble if there were explosives involved, but it was a way to avoid shooting a child.

Just as I was thinking about that, my sergeant came by and saw what was taking place. He told me that I had to shoot before it was too late. I told him I couldn't. I knew that was wrong because if I disobeyed him, I would be up for court martial. All that aside, it was my duty to defend my post, and one way or another, I knew down deep I was going to do just that.


We decided I would try for a leg shot to stop her. We had no idea where the explosives would be if there were any, but we figured not on the legs since the child had to walk some distance before an explosion would be effective. My sergeant and I spent what seemed like hours working on a solution, but actually it was only about five minutes. The child was about a hundred yards away, and to avoid dangerous percussion waves from doing damage to our ammo, we had to act now.


Lynnita, the last time I tried to write about this, I ended up vomiting for fifteen minutes. After fifty years, I am feeling sick in my stomach. My belt feels too tight. I've got to loosen it. I am going to jump through this fast....


I shot that child in the leg. There was a scream, the little child rolled on the ground for a second, and then exploded. As I am now, I cried and cried. I got sick all over myself, wet my pants, and just kept screaming, "You bastards!" I threw my rifle down and ran out into the field. I heard two gunshots in the distance and hit the ground. After a while, a jeep went past me like hell to the spot where the little child was. My sergeant came and got me, and we went back to camp. One of my buddies gave me a half bottle of Seagram's.  I finished it and started vomiting again.


For the next few days, I was questioned, comforted, given time off. I was then, and still am, hurt to the core. I don't ever see how I will forget. It just seems that I am torturing myself with this always in my mind. I am convinced that I must bear this burden in the memory of that little child. I never found out if the child was a boy or a girl.


How do I ask others to honor this child when I know nothing of the child except of the horrible death the child suffered at my hand. If God hears my prayers, I know this child is in a better place. I have prayed hundreds of prayers for salvation for a nameless, unknown child who lost life in a paddy one cold December day in Korea. I have asked God for forgiveness for my horrible deed, but I put myself in His place, and I decide that I don't deserve forgiveness. Understanding-maybe. But I can see I will carry this hurt forever. I don't ask others to walk in my shoes just to understand why it is so hard for me to walk in them. I don't think that's asking too much, considering what most of us vets have seen and done.
- Richard W. Cooper


Bob

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Communicating Your Feelings

News
No new updates for this week.

Quote

“ If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting? "
-Stephen Levine

My Thoughts

Sometimes we think we have all the time in the world to tell someone how we feel, and/or we assume that the other person knows how we feel. Those of you that have ever lost a loved one probably wish you could have talked with them one last time.

As many of you know I lost my Mom to cancer when I was 13. She was a role model for me in my early years. My Dad has been a big role model throughout my life. He is the one that taught me the values of persistence, not making excuses,and taking risks. Oddly, I never told him that until last year. After telling him this he became emotional and then told me he never realized the positive impact he had on my life. I had always assumed that he knew. I suppose it goes back to last week's message about not assuming.

I encourage all of us this week to let someone know how much we appreciate them.

Have an outstanding week.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Relationships

News
No new updates for this week.

Quote
“ We mistakenly assume that if our partners love us they will react and behave in certain ways - the ways we react and behave when we love someone.
-John Gray

My Thoughts
Assumptions and miscommunication can lead relationships down a dangerous path. One that ultimately leads to failure. This is what I have experienced.

I pondered discussing this, but I am not one to hide things because perhaps my experience can help one of you. 

I am recently divorced. I was in a relationship for eight years (married for five years) before we separated last summer and eventually divorced. I have no harsh feelings about my ex and I wish her the best. What lead to our divorce was assumptions and miscommunication. Even though both of us are certified coaches we still failed to communicate properly.

Relationships take work, we can't just assume that our partners will react and behave the same way that we do. Even though my ex and I knew better we eventually allowed our communication to break down and we assumed that somehow it would work itself out. The problem was that the communication broke down for so long that we weren't able to get it back on track.

Oftentimes men assume that woman will communicate directly, while women assume that men will be able to read into what they are saying. This leads to many arguments. It's the equivalent of speaking a language to someone that doesn't understand the language you are speaking.

I have learned that in order for a relationship to work we need to let go of assumptions. We need to be willing to learn to communicate. We need to learn to give up saying how our partners "should" be acting. Finally we need to stop comparing our partners to others (especially exes). Those are a few things that I have learned and I am sure that I will learn many other lessons as life goes on.

I encourage all of you to look at any of your relationships and ask yourself, "Am I doing my best?", "and What could I do to improve my relationships?". After you answer those questions,  I recommend that you put what you learned into action.

I highly recommend the books "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" by John Gray, and "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman.

Have a wonderful week.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Love

News
No new updates for this week

Instead of sharing a quote and my thoughts this week, I found a story that I wanted to share with you.

Story
by Massud Farzan

A lover knocked at the door of his beloved.

"Who is it?" she replied.

The lover replied, "It is I."

"Go away. This house will not hold you and I."

The rejected lover retreated into the wilderness. For a long time he prayed and meditated on the beloved's words. Finally he returned and knocked at the door again.

"Who is it?" she said again.

The lover replied, "It is you."

Immediately, the door opened.

Have an awesome week!